Finding Balance... Even When You Fall

During class...

When we practice tree or other balancing postures in class, there is a very real possibility that we will lose our balance and fall over.  Even those of us with great balance occasionally fall over.  If you are a regular in class, you have probably heard me say:

“If you fall over, just fall over.  Try not to add anything extra to it.  Just smile, breathe and then start again.” 

What I mean by this is that if you lose your balance, just allow yourself to fall over without adding anything extra like anger, frustration, impatience, etc.  It is all too easy when we fall over to mentally berate ourselves, or even express our frustration outwardly with a few choice expletives (believe it or not I’ve heard a fair share of these over the years).

Smiling when you fall over can immediately help you generate some goodwill and compassion toward yourself, and breathing will help you maintain equanimity.  Let the falling over be a part of the process... not something that isn’t supposed to happen.  Take your time, be in the moment, get grounded, and then start again.   In this way you can maintain balance in your mind, even if you temporarily lose it in your body.

Outside of class...

Sometimes we “fall over” in life.  Perhaps we lose our temper and say something in anger to someone that we care about, which hurts their feelings.  Or we eat too much for lunch or dinner, and then feel lousy afterwards.  In both of the above scenarios, it’s quite possible that we were feeling happy and balanced in our mental outlook until some unforeseen circumstance came along and caused us to fall out of balance... out of mental, spiritual and physical harmony.

In these moments it can be helpful to just stop for a moment and recognize what has happened... that we have fallen from a state of feeling balance and harmony.  We can take a few deep breaths, as many as it takes, inwardly smile toward ourselves with mindfulness and compassion, and then begin again.  We can get grounded and take a fresh start. 

Example: Speaking Out in Anger
If you have spoken to someone in anger, perhaps ask the person if you can both just sit down and breath together for a little while, or walk together in silence, while you come back to your breath and regain your balance.  During this time, don’t berate yourself or cultivate negative feelings toward yourself for speaking out in anger.  Don’t add anything extra.  Just mindfully observe your breath, and perhaps contemplate the real cause of your anger.  After some time, you can apologize and tell the person you are with that you care about them, and want to begin anew. 

Example: Eating Too Much at Lunch or Dinner
Suppose that you put too much food on your plate, and then eat everything on it.  Afterwards your stomach feels too full, and your body feels uncomfortable.  In these moments, it doesn’t help to beat yourself up with negative self-talk.  Instead, you can sit down, focus on your breathing, and simply acknowledge that you are feeling too full in the present moment.  However, you can also note that this feeling is temporary and will pass, and that you’ll have another opportunity to be more skillful at the next mealtime.  You can cultivate peace within yourself by focusing on what is wonderful and good in the present moment.  

When you lose your balance, on or off the mat... smile, breathe, and then begin again.  Let these moments be opportunities for you to cultivate compassion and goodwill towards yourself and the people that you are with.

Om Shanti, Om Peace

Meditation Technique: Counting Backward from 50

Counting backwards is one of my favorite (and most often employed) meditation techniques.  I first learned this practice from Erich Schiffman, who is one of my first teachers in the yoga tradition.  Below are Erich’s instructions for the practice, straight from his excellent book:

“Yoga - The Spirit & Practice of Moving into Stillness.”  

You can read the full chapter online at his website if you like.

Counting Backward Meditation
“In this exercise you will be counting backward from fifty to zero, synchronizing the counting with your breathing. You'll count the even numbers as you exhale and the odd numbers as you inhale.

Sit with your back straight and your eyes closed. If you can sit comfortably on the floor, do so. Otherwise, use a chair. Be comfortable.

Begin by breathing in gently, fully. As yell exhale, mentally say "fifty." As you breathe in again, mentally say "forty-nine," exhale "forty-eight," inhale "forty-seven," exhale "forty-six" ... and so on.

Count backward on both the in-breath and the out-breath until you reach "twenty," then count only on exhales. Silently count "twenty" as you exhale. Then, instead of counting "nineteen" on the in-breath, do nothing, just inhale. With the next exhalation count "nineteen" ... and so on until you reach zero.

When you reach zero, stop counting, but stay aware of the natural flow of breath in exactly the same way as when you were counting. Watch the breath as though you were going to count, but don't count. As you do this, practice sitting absolutely still. But don't hold yourself still. Simply be so relaxed that no movement occurs.

Be very aware of how you feel as you do this--how peaceful, energized, calm. Notice how pleasantly alert you are, how serene, fearless, at ease. Familiarize yourself with this feeling, with the feeling-tone of being centered and at peace, and rest here another two or three minutes. Absorb the stillness. Then prepare yourself, open your eyes, and return. This will take six or seven minutes.

As you do this exercise, breathe normally. Do not do deep breathing or control the breath in any way. This is important. You are learning not to be in control. You are learning to get out of the way. Therefore, rather than controlling the breath, allow it to flow freely in and out at its own natural pace. Yet, stay aware of the breath. Keep track of the numbers. As the breath comes in, count. As the breath goes out, count. And when you reach zero, stay aware of the breath nonverbally. There should be no strain in your breathing as you do this. Keep it soft and easy.

As you count backward, you may be more aware than usual of your mind darting rapidly from one object of attention to another. You may be unusually aware of sounds, physical sensations, or thoughts. You may lose count altogether. None of this matters. All of these things are evidence that the technique is working. You're becoming more aware.
The value of this technique lies in its ability to help you notice where your attention is from moment to moment, what's in your mind, and the contents of your consciousness. The counting is not only a centering device and a way of developing concentration, of training your mind to focus, it also acts as a backdrop on which your thoughts become very apparent.

For now, however, do not do anything with the various thoughts or sensations that arise. Simply be aware of them and continue counting. Gradually become more aware, more quiet within yourself, and increasingly dynamically still. As you immerse yourself in your stillness--and this is something that improves with each attempt--you will experience an unexpected and immensely satisfying sense of contentment and ease. Feel the peace.”